Bummed again!

I'm bummed again. In fact, I'm doubly bummed.

I'm bummed because my son is bummed. He's bummed because his life has taken a sharp turn that he wasn't ready for and he's sad and upset and angry and frustrated and probably fearful and, did I mention sad? I'm sad because I can't do a damn thing to help him except be here in case he needs me for something, anything.

He didn't come to Thanksgiving dinner today because the wounds are still very fresh and he'd rather be alone. I understand that fully. But I've decided to call him at least once a day until I feel he's getting back on his feet. I've called twice today and he's not answering the phone. Maybe he's out with friends. I can only hope so.

Anyway, it sucks to have someone you love feeling like they're in the deep, dark woods at midnight without a flashlight. I want to put my arms around the whole forest and keep all the baddies out so he'll be safe no matter where in the forest he is. I want to put little candles on every path so if he happens by he'll know there's a way out if he wants it. I want.. I want... I want him not to be sad anymore.

So I'm bummed.

Yesterday I saw a man wearing a jacket which had the letters B.U.M. on the back. Big letters. On a big back. Just above a big bum.

Today I got dressed and reached into my closet and pulled out a sweatshirt I have not worn much, if ever, since getting it for Christmas a few years ago from my sister-in-law.

Nearly fainted when I looked in the mirror on my way out of the bedroom. Emblazoned right above my heart is the phrase

B U M Equipment

Do you think this sweatshirt was intended for cardiac patients?
Whatever. I decided to keep it on. I feel like bum equipment today.